Which one is much more harder? sharing people's joy? or sharing people's sadness?
This was the question that the invited speaker throw to us. My thought that time were, surely people's sadness because sadness is hard for us to listen to people's sad story. After he paused for a while, he answered, "it's people's Joy...". The reason behind this is that, do you normally see a bunch of people happy when a person is in joy. For example, if people were promoted to a much a higher post, there are surely people who are not impressed or jealous of the person who got promoted. This was one of the example given by Dr. Christopher Ash who came to Malaysia for the first time of his life from England.
What he said was actually so true when I experienced it first hand when it comes to this question. Never would I expect people to say this to me when I throw this question to them. It happened when I received a text message from one of my coursemates asking me whether want to join in to go to the convocation of our super senior that happened today. I answered yes as long as there is someone picking me up from my apartment. I was actually referring to my housemates aka my coursemates as well.
Ok, here is what happened when I approached this question to those people in the house with transport. One of them answered with a definitive answer of NO...another one also replied NO...so ok, the 3rd person, ...I don't know them well,they senior did not invite me. if I go also no point....if the others go, I will go also.
So, it forces me to make a decisions which I totally regret and feel sorry about that is not going. I'm feeling so bad until now. Anway, the story doesn't end there. Later on, another coursemates of our own eventually called us to see whether we are going or not. What piss me off by then is the way they handled the conversation. Imagine, the phone is pass on from a person to another and it was forwarded to 3 person, and my coursemate had to repeat his question 3 times and what he get were all No. OMG!!! if they ever treat me that way, I don't know what will happened to me. By the way, they did not pass the phone to me as I don't have a transport.
As I ponder upon my decision which I made earlier, I realised that I made a mistake by following their decision. Can you imagine staying with those bunch of people who never bother anything that happened around them. If you are reading 3 posts before this, you will know by now who I am talking about. Can you imagine I'm following those people's decision, gosh!!! I should not. way not. I just can't believe that I'm living in the same roof with the people who only have their world evolves around their study, watching drama, playing Dota, listening to the same song every now and then, going to the same shop to eat over and over again and never get tired of it. Another person who was not part of them is not observing the Sabbath day any longer which I was kind of not really content about. If he does it again, I will advice him this time around. It was so bad that, he went to meetings, rather than keep the sabbath day holy. surprisingly. He is the one who get used and understand more the way of living as a true christian more than me. surprise surprise, there is always a twist....hmmm...
Ok, let me check what are they doing now, since they don't even make a move of going to the convocation, are they really busy??
OMG, all of them are studying, looks like studying for finals are more important than any other stuffs. Even losing respects from others, they are willing to sacrifice. Is that all about life, everything study? Maybe for them, they live to study. I'm not their parents either. It is their life. I'm not in charge of it. I can only advice them if they went too much of something(in this case not study...). For me, I'd rather pause for a while to do some other more 'humane' things like blogging this post and hope that it serves as an advice so that, anyone of you out there can ponder upon.
Anyway, I just realised that some of those people in the house are really demanding and the fact that sometime they are just 'tin kosong' (my definition for tin kosong( empty can is quite different, I will explain later). One of those things that I observed are some of them will not involve themselves in any activities that doesn't benefit them. It is so bad to the step that once I asked them to join, they answered me with the weirdest and most ridiculious answer around, It was '...if there is a post without working, i will join...", the answer kept us all laughing that time. But as I looked back at it, it shows sometime negative on them. Guess what I found out recently, one of them rather pay RM120 member fee to join Golden Key society. haha, funny though, society that doesn't requires member fee, he doesn't want to join. He just purely look down on they other 'low class' societies. He rather joined the prestigious one. What is the different in joining Golden Key with other societies around?? probably he joined it because of fame. undeniable...Guess what, that is the first society he joined in UPM... gosh, this one really irritates me. For those of you who didn't know about Golden Key, Golden Key is a society that is only open to those smart as* in the school. Their requirement for you to join....CGPA must be 3.50 and above. I will not join this society even if I scored CGPA 4.0...over my dead body....
The reason are
1) From my opinion, why should a society restrict and opens only to high achiever, it is clearly a look down on people who score less than that CGPA. In God's eyes, everyone is equal...mind you
2) It is just plain unacceptable if a society give a letter congratulating people on their result and talk all the hu...ha about wah, u score 25% of what is required for your whole 4 years course and then invites people to join their society providing you pay rm120 as a membership fees. They never specifies what is their rm120 for...just said it is membership fee. Can you imagine, they ask Rm120 from students. If you pay rm120 then you are part of 'US'. If you don't pay, even if you score 4.0 CGPA also no use. Can you imagine a poor fellow who is a genius and got rejected because he is poor. Stupid. It is clearly a society for the rich and smart people.
All in all, this society really insult a lot of people by the way the run the society although it has a lot of benefits joining them.
Going back to earlier statement, What I meant by 'Tin Kosong' (empty can) was on the appearance, they are clever and good at study but beneath everything, can you imagine, those basic things also they don't know how to do. For example, budgetting, they just spend and spend like our house is growing money tree. I know, some of them have their parents giving them money every week... they don't have sense of responsibility even. Another example is, one of them don't even know how to wash his cloth. that is like the basic thing, which is washing cloths and still he don't know how to do it. All he did is to bring it back for his mother to wash every weekend...gosh!!!no money, go back ask parents, want to wash cloths, bring back for mommy to wash. Where is the sense of independence. I would not mentioned about cooking cause many people out there nowadays cannot cook. Not only that, basic thing of repairing the toilet also I have to do for them...where's the sense in that...
I guess I really need more air to breath here. There are just too much bad aura around, kiasu-ness, ignorance, disrespect, no sense of responsiblity, look down on people, and lastly sellfish....I really need air to breath in here. argh....
Only one of my housemates is ok and not towards that zone which I mentioned above. It started with two person, now it is spreading to the 3 person. the other guy I just mentioned is just playing on the safe side. I'm the one starting to be rebellious. I really need air to breath, look at what they've changed me, I used to be earlier to class, never late...now I need to follow their car and I'm late also. I rarely and very very very very seldom 'ponteng' but now I did it. And now, I just want to be good and sharing people's joy but was influenced by them. It is such a pain in the neck. Everytime I study also I'm not studying in peace. the aura of kiasu-ness is there everytime. Gosh I need peace to study and to pass my exam and that's all...please!!!
*big sighs* and *big relieves*, so what is your stand now, sharing people's joy is harder or sharing people's sadness? Looks like I've just shared my thoughts and my sorrow that have been with me for so long. Not that I don't want to share people's advantages but it is so hard for me to find one among all of them. It is so hard, the only thing that I can said is they are clever, and that's it...
God I really pray and need your help to go through this and help me strong be strong to endure this 'storm'. I really hope that I can become a better person that go strong to my faith and to what I believe in.
Song playing in my mind now- Learning to Breath by Switchfoot
For those who read this long post until this far, I personally thank you for listening to my thoughts and rants. It is just to hard for me to keep it into myself...thanks ya
XOXO